(Monstrous) Creativity Unleashed!!

Creativity.. Creativity, an overused word touted by our modern educationists and frequently debated on in the national newspapers. Our children, our youths, the 4 million population of the country, Singapore, lack this omni-important ingredient - creativity!

What do we have?! A nation of robots, mass-produced by our ISO 9000 certified schools, only capable of following the book and walking in a straight line. This probably accounts for the lack of graffiti on our pristinely clean walls. Ta dah! Yet another blatant example of lack of creativity. (Ooops, should I think of a synonym for "creativity"?? Nah.. I don't think I'm capable of it, being a true blue product of this uncreative society).

Parents lament over this and send their children to expensive, inefficient (from the looks of it) creativity classes all over the island. They even go to the extent of enrolling their children in schools at the other end of Singapore, bravely enduring the torment of traffic jams. (Well, since Singaporeans are even willing to trot across the island in search of gourmet dishes, this is a small price to pay, in exchange for children who will ooze creativity after attending the classes.)

Ahhh... BUT!!! Little do they know that, the best kept secret to funneling the essence of "creativity" is actually in this website. I present to you, the zenith of creativity (contributed by the God of Links, I totally worship him!!!) - Mr. Picassohead. Once you port over to this amazing website and start putting lines on the blank screen, you will positively feel the elixir of creativity gush into you.....

Finally, here is my very own masterpiece (For people who do not know how to open links, please click on the linked word-masterpiece to see my drawing. Sharon Law (she has kindly reminded me to put her surname in, since Sharon is such a common name), this remark is specially added for YOU!!). A new artist of the Impressionist era has been born..... *fireworks*

Psst... I have had my eye on this Picasso drawing for ages... Since it's going to be Christmas soon... GET THE HINT?! Nah.. You don't have to give me the original piece, just a nice decent printed copy will do. GET THE 2ND HINT?!

T'is the season to be jolly... Tra la... la la la....

T'is the Season to be Jolly. La la la la....

Ho ho ho! Yes! It will be Christmas in 8 days.

Well, I must admit that I'm not a very Christmassy person. I was when I was little because Christmas equated to presents, many many presents. Right now, Christmas means that I have to trudge through masses of people just to buy necessities. Orchard Road is a madhouse nowadays. It seems that the whole of Singapore is there. SIgh....

Still, it's a day to be celebrated, else I wouldn't have a paid non-working day... Arhh.. That is bliss.... not having to go to the office and pretend that I'm working. Some information for people who simply love their jobs : Pretending to be busy is much more torturous than being really busy. *shrug*

Since it's the Christmas season anyway, here are 2 links, contributed by Duma (See! I have the decency to acknowledge friends.. unlike SOMEONE... that SOMEONE knows whom I'm referring to! *folds arms*)

1. Snowfight!!
Somehow, it reminds me of SouthPark... Kenny in particular. The agonising shrieks emitted by the cute little fellows are rather disturbing... That goes for the unnatural cackles at the end of the game.

2. Snow Globe
Watch the little ones fly in the air in agony as you shake the globe. *evil laugh*

Where have all the cobblers gone?

As usual, my shoes gave way at the most unexpected time. Well, 2 nails fell out and the rubber sole at the heel was flapping (a little), and the very last nail threatened to join his brothers on the floor. Somehow, the old men (the cobblers), located at every corner of the town centres, just had to pick this appropriate time to go on vacation....

The nearest and definite place I could think of, was the Mister Minit at Thomson Plaza. Carefully stepping on the dislocated rubber, I finally made my way to the booth tucked away in a corner. Heaving a sigh of relief, I handed my shoe gingerly to Mister Minit.

"How much does it cost and how long do I need to wait?"
"$13.80 and half an hour."
*Eyes widened* "What?! You charge $13.80 for putting 2 nails into my shoe?! You have got to be kidding!!"
"No, I will be changing the whole rubber sole."*flashed 2 rubber pieces with Mister Minit logos liberally peppered across*
"I don't need new ones."
"They are already worn out."
"There is still one big chunk left!! Ok. Thanks for the information."
Mister Minit shrugged nonchalantly and went on with his chores.

I limped into NTUC Fairprice (a supermarket chainstore) and bought a big bag of nails for ONLY $1.90. I managed to put 2 fat nails into my heel (narrowly missing my fat fingers). It seems that I have the makings of a cobbler. *Beam* *Pat on my back*

New Year's Resolutions!!!

10th Dec 2003

Ok ok, it's the time of the year again! A time to make resolutions, because it's the trend, and not keep them. Here goes....

1. I will sleep early every night (latest by 12 midnight... Pumpkin hour...)
2. I will not watch so much television programmes.
3. I will catch up with all my friends.
4. I will not gain an kg from my gluttony.
5. I will invest my money wisely and not squander them away.
6. I will appear in the office on time.

Hmmm... hmm... I will add on as I think about it... Has anyone mentioned that New Year Resolutions are supposed to be made before 1st Jan? Does 1st Jan 2005 count?? *ponder*

Colours of Life!

Hmm.. The writing mechanism in my brain is rather stiff from long period of disuse. I'm too used to doing calculations and writing boring factual reports that I need some 10 minutes before I can gather my thoughts to write this entry. Maybe eating fish would help.

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Back to the main topic - Colours of Life! Ta-Dah!! The latest brainchild of my friend, Jiahui, who's into coaching. Her articles are revolving around Changes, Getting to know your true self and setting directions for your life.

In my opinion, which may be slightly biased, since she is one of my oldest friends after all, the blog provides interesting reading material. Of course, you probably won't gain instant enlightenment, you know.... a 180 degrees change in your present lifestyle, but they may serve to direct your thoughts in the right area.

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THERE! I have advertised your blog for you!! When will I be getting my dinner treat??!

I have sneezed so much in the past 2 days that I'm sure my nose will be falling off soon! In a totally miserable mood right now.

Still, I'm proud to say that I'm pretty productive today. Creating a short movie clip right now and I'm halfway through. Although my brother said that this was the easiest phase. Spending more than a few days collecting the relevant data and probably a few more full days to get it up and running. All for a 4 mins plus clip. Ack!

Peeling away the technical difficulties, (I'm sure it would be a breeze once I do it a few more times!), it's a lot more painful to get people to give me one little photo and a short writeup. Well well, no air space for them then!

Have been waiting for the impact of the repercussion from Mon's posting... All seem nice, quiet and peaceful at the moment... Because Duma has been recalled by the army to fulfill his manly duties - reservist!! (Info kindly volunteered by Kokwai.)

I expect to bear the full brunt of the impact when he's let out. (Coupled with the frustration overspill from the reservist's physical torture.) *Shivers in little shoes*

Dinner Topic for Today (backdated to 17th October, Friday)

A group of my friends just paid a visit to Bangkok (They conveniently forgot to tell me about the trip! @#%#%!!!). The rest of us (who were left behind) could only enjoy the exotic tales from the horse's mouth. (Literally, because the narrator's nick is Du-ma aka Gambling Horse. *Dodges a tomato* Ok ok, forgive me for the tasteless pun. On with the story...)

We were having dinner at Kenny Rogers (Suntec City, to be precise) while Duma was regaling us with his Thai Massage tales.

"We had 2 sessions of massage. The first one was the real authentic one at the temple. Waa... The guy used a lot of strength! Shiok!!!"

"So you meant the 2nd one was not a "real", "authentic" one? Was it by a woman?"

"Yalor. There was a row of massage houses near the hotel, so we just popped into one. Yep, woman."

"Oh.. Was she caressing rather than massaging?"

"Something like that."

"Waaa.... Did you have full service!?"

"OF COURSE NOT! We were in the same room as the gals!(4 of my friends went on this trip, 2 of them were girls.)"

"*gasp* If the girls weren't in the room, you would have....."

"Siao! I have good control ok!! (The rest of us were exchanging knowing looks.) I didn't go...." (He re-enacted the scene from "When Harry met Sally", Meg Ryan's .... )

During this special moment, I could feel the attention of everyone in the restaurant focused on us. Unknown to us, the volume of our excited voices was increasing as the conversation progressed, climaxing at this point.

A group of young girls at the table next to us were giving us strange looks. (There were 5 of us at that table). When I meant, us, it was literally US, Pig and I, as our seats were in full frontal view of theirs. "They were all staring straight at ME!!!" he squealed. The Pig was rather concerned about his image, him being a professional and still single.

So, for the sake of his future, we decided to finish our dinner (in a hurry), and hunt for another place (Macs, as it's usually rather noisy anyway.) to finish our Thai tales.

Latest resolution : No more visits to Kenny Rogers (Suntec City) for this whole year. Hopefully, time heals all humiliation.


Note : Through my magic crystal ball, I foresee a comment coming from pig/schwein/whatever-he-feels-like-calling-himself-at-that-spur-of-the-moment. He will not be able to pass over a temptation like that, staring at him in his face. We shall see. Or he might (with a strong willpower) control his emotions and abstain from commenting on this, one post, just to prove me wrong. DUH!

Grouses..... ^%#$%#$%#

I simply cannot understand :
1. How a black and white document with less than 20 words can be translated into a 2.5MB file!!!
2. Why somebody would attach 2 stupid identical 2.5MB file to an email!

My Lotus notes has been running for the past 45 mins, trying to open this email and sending it out!

^%#$%#$%@

The only silver lining is - I have something to blog about in my boring life. Hmpf!

My Son is a Gangster! Ha Dah!

The air was heavy with the smell of perspiration and stale odour of cigarette smoke. Clusters of people were congregated in the little Kopitiam. A Malay song, from a beaten radio, blared above the volume of the customers’ idle chatter.

In a little corner of the Kopitiam, a middle-aged man was recounting his son's exploits with relish.

"When my son was in kindergarten arh, he asked me to give him money to buy sweets. So I told him, "Daddy is very poor, no money lar." Then you know what he did?"

Prompted by his question, I replied (with a typical and standard answer), wearing a look of intense interest on my face, "No, what did he do?"

“Wa…. He went to the school the next day and asked his classmate to give him money!”

*Gasp* “Isn’t that extortion!?”

“Yalor! He told his classmate to give him money, or else he will beat him up!!!”

“Did his classmate hand his money over?”

“Yeah! He did! And he came home and gave me the money and said, “Papa, papa! You said you have no money. I give you money!”

“Then what did you do? Did you scold him?”

“Aiya. How can I have the heart to scold him? He didn’t extort money for himself leh. He did it for me! So smart! He’s thinking for me.” He chuckled happily, reliving the scene all over again.

“Oh…. Erm… “ Laughed uneasily. “Your son is…. So con..si..de…rate.”

Just to keep accounts straight. This middle-aged man is a manager with high earning power and he owns a 2l car and a private apartment. I can’t help but wonder, how many of these little monsters will be churned out in this century, by the senseless indulgence of parents.

Hamster Jokes

Story and characters are real and not fictitious. Names have been omitted to prevent these people from being jeered/insulted/having tomatoes thrown at them in public places.

*ring ring*
Me:Hey hey! I have picked up J's birthday hamster!!It's so Cuuuute!It is a he!!!
C: Oh really. (In a very bored tone)
Me: His birthday is on 18th August.
C:Wait. Let me take this down.
Me:Why are you taking it down? Didn't know that you are so interested in hamsters...
C: Silence
Me:Oiy! Why are you taking down the hamster's birthday?!
C:Hamster? You mean that's not J's birthday?
Me:Erm.. no.
C:Then say so lar!!!

*ring ring*
Me:Yo! I have your birthday present ready! Have to pass it to you!
(Mumble mumble. Meeting date + venue set.)

(Lugging a large cage with great difficulty)
J:Where's my present? Why did you bring your hamster out? To show me?
Me: Hmmm... That's not MY hamster.
J:Oh shit!

J is currently feeling very repentent for having hurt his hamster's feelings with these harsh words. But his hamster (which is a he) is being subjected to more trauma, by being named... VIRGO! Ack!!! He is, at this very moment, trying very hard to dig a hole in the plastic tank, to tuck his head in.

Wednesday 24 September 2003 - Latest update!

Virgo has been renamed as JJ. He is beginning to eat a little. There is a marked improvement in his appetite. Not only that, his nightmares have apparently ceased. He looks much happier and relieved.

Sunday... down the drain...

SIgh.. THere goes my weekend. Less than 30 mins left til Mon! The most hated day of the week!

I had big plans for Sunday. The list went on and on.... I have only accomplished one miserable item!!

I have squandered my precious Sunday by playing flash games! Ack!! Can you believe it?! Me neither! Before I knew it, SUnday is GONE! The main culprit was Dynomite! If you have great faith in yourself, click on the link, by all means!

I am presently experiencing cramps in my right hand and fingers, having maintained the mouse position for the whole day. Hmm... Come to think of it, my thumb looks swollen! Arghghgh! There! I hear an offer (from my brother) for a hand massage. He is probably feeling the pangs of guilt for having introduced me to the website. Huh!

Halfway through a Matrix Report... Yawn!

Why is it that whenever I'm working, I would think of:
1. Sleeping
2. Blogging
3. Net Surfing
4. Watching TV
5. Eating Snacks ('Working' is very detrimental for Health and Figure!!)
6. Etc

Basically, anything BUT working?!

Very bad attitude. I would sack me if I were my boss. Ack!

Dedicated to all hamster lovers out there!!



Yep yep! Recently I have been dosed with the hamster madness. Instead of fixing my eyes on the goggle box, I have diverted my attention to the hamster forum. Stumbled across it recently (Ok ok, not so recent after all... I have been sadly lacking with the updating of my blog. BUT I am making up for it! See! Postings on consecutive days!! *gives myself a pat on the back*).

Wealth of information on hamsters in there and loads of helpful and fun people. Highly recommended! Duma, take note of this to refine your links taste-o-meter! Blah!!

Linked the image to the forum. Hope the forum master doesn't mind.

Housekeeping... La la la

Hmm.. 2 days of blogging in a row. There may still be hope for me!!

Have done some housekeeping. Updated some outdated links (erm.. actually, 1 only.) Got rid of some dead links. Don't think those people will get their butts back to blogging.

K.. Will have to come up with a new template soon.....

Newsflash Newsflash! (5 month old news actually!)

My brain cells die at an exponential rate with each passing year... I have just realised (Yep! No excuse for this! After 5 whole months!) that I have forgotten to put this important news into my blog. I have got a new hamster!! Not very new actually... It's already 6 months old (Taking into account, that hamsters have a general lifespan of 1.5-2 years!! He's going through his quarter life crsis!!!). Lena gave him to me for my birthday! To replace Hammie (Oiy! Aren't you proud that I named my last hamster after you?!) whom I have left behind in Germany.

Annd... His name is... (Ta da!!) PUDDING! His godmother (aka Lena Mama) has criticised this name, citing that it's totally unoriginal... Acks! He is a Winter White Pudding (Name of his breed). And it is really coincidental that Mango Pudding is one of my (numerous) favourite desserts!! Yum yum!! But, little did I know, that this name would be his downfall..... The little hamster has evolved into a wobbly, orange pudding on little patter feet, living up to his namesake.

No amount of exercise nor dieting can alter his bottom heavy figure. I think Marie France or Expressions would do very well to come up with a Hamster Fats Reducing Programme. I am patiently waiting for this day to arrive, so that my little (or not so little) Pudding can recover his slim figure. Meanwhile, it's back to good ole Hamster Ball!!

How much is your soul worth?!

Duma sent me this link.

Mine costs a whopping 24,276 pounds (S$67,861). His only costs 19,343 pounds (S$53,929) - Very Cheap!!

Hee hee!

Haven't written for ages. Rust is corroding away my fingers and brain. Since I am waiting for my slowpoke email server to load up... here goes....

28th May 2003 3pm

First impression : Changi hospital operates like a micro-Singapore.

Being a programmed Singaporean, I was set in an auto-obedience mode. Without knowing what the heck was happening, I have already been dutifully shuttled in and out of a series of rooms and have subjected myself to various tests and cross-examinations. The lengthy intervals between them were spent aimlessly at teh corridor, with the rest of my equally unsuspecting fellow comrades.

Once in a while, a fully masked and geared up nurse would approach me, mumble an incoherent "Re..m.ve y'ear sp.ect..acurs", wave a brightly-lit torch into my eyes, before shuffling off to one of the nameless doors, oblivious to my plight and condition.

"Can someone tell me what's happening??!!!"

As I am writing this, I continue my ignorant wait, hoping to see some kind of light at the end of the dark tunnel. OOops, here comes another nurse armed with... YET another torchLIGHT!! Not quite the same "light" I have in mind. Forgive my weak pun, waiting in incomprehension shrivels up my creative cells.

YAWN!

XMen Mania!


My One Cent contribution to the Xmen mania surging through Singapore. I am sure with the release of the Xmen2 Movie, the prices of the comic books and figurines have been pushed up, higher than ever!

So, folks, Enter and Enjoy!
By the way, according to the test, I AM STORM!

Take the reviews on the characters with a pinch of salt! Ack!

Credits: Xmen link contributed by Kokwai, the Xmen crazed fan.

Have been toying with the idea of upgrading to Blogspot plus so that I will have the disk space to put up my own pictures and design my webpage... But then again, will I ever get down to doing it??!!

*ponder*

Dante's Inferno Test

Feeling very bloggable tonight.

After all the evil and vengeful thoughts I have had for the whole night, I have decided to attempt the Dante's Inferno Test.

The wretched King Minos has decided your fate. His tale (duh.. some spelling error here. I think it should be "tail" though I might be wrong.) wraps around his body 5 times.
The sweet light no longer strikes against your eyes.Your shade has been banished to... the 5th level of Hell

The Dante's Inferno Test has banished you to the Fifth Level of Hell!
Here is how you matched up against all the levels:

Level	Score
Purgatory (Repenting Believers)	Very Low
Level 1 - Limbo (Virtuous Non-Believers)	Very Low
Level 2 (Lustful)	Low
Level 3 (Gluttonous)	High
Level 4 (Prodigal and Avaricious)	High
Level 5 (Wrathful and Gloomy)	Extreme
Level 6 - The City of Dis (Heretics)	Very High
Level 7 (Violent)	Very High
Level 8- the Malebolge (Fraudulent, Malicious, Panderers)	High
Level 9 - Cocytus (Treacherous)	Moderate

Take the Dante's Inferno Hell Test

Oh ho ho! It says here that I am wrathful and gloomy..!!! I love it! I love it!

I find that I am not very coherent when angered.

New Resolution :

To BLOG ONLY under CONTROLLED conditions.
DUH!

Frustrations! @#!@%&*@!!!

My friend told me that I could do whatever I want, for my wedding dinner and that included inviting whoever I wanted. He said, "After all, it is YOUR wedding, that is your right to do so!" But, Cheong, do you know how wrong you are?!

Sadly, that is not a reality of life. To create this once in a lifetime, perfect moment, I have to scrimp and save every cent. This includes eating cheap meals, not buying the things, which I badly want.....only to find that, at the end of the day, I cannot choose with whom I want to enjoy this moment.

50% of the guests who will be there, will be people whom I have probably not met in my entire life and will attend the function for reasons which I can never fathom in a hundred years. To them, it will probably be a normal meal to meet up with friends or relatives whom they have not talked to for the last decade.

Since they have never ever set eyes upon me or my partner, there is no reason for them to be here at all! I resent the fact that I am the one who has to pay for their little gathering. YES! YES I DO RESENT the fact that I have to scrimp and save for a bunch of people who do not give a damn about this most important day of my life! I do not mind spending the money on people who genuinely care about me.

However, if I were to hold it at a place which I do not genuinely like, or if I have to cut down on other expense just to pay for these freeloaders, that would be short-changing myself! I want everything to be perfect for this very day!

For goodness sake, this is my wedding dinner! Why does it have to be a stupid gathering for long distance relatives!!!!!!!! Can't they just hold their little luncheon at some other place and time!

*At this moment of time, I amd really pissed off and feel like spewing some really, awfully, extremely, absolutely vulgar phrases! What the FISH!!!*

YH just criticised my Kito post. She claimed that it was incoherent. I thought that it was obviously about this mosquito which plagued me for the whole night and eventually died from an overdose of my poisonous blood?!

Is it really THAT BAD?!

Kito Sneak Attack!!!

Night Vision mode activated.
Multiple Targets locked on.
Fire!

Kito buries its miniscular sting repeatedly into a few spots of the left foot of the poor victim.

Object successfully retrieved and digested.
Next Target area locked on.

Kito makes its move as the left hand scratches the inital bombed zone.

4 Target grounds bombed and objects successfully retrieved.
Sneak Mission successfully comple...ted...

Kito goes into convulsions....and clutches its neck.....
Blood ... is... poisonous......
Kito makes one last twitch as life drains away from it.

Muahhahahah!!!! Face the wrath of Ah Wei!!!! Warning to all Kitos... Sting me and die!!! Muahahahahah!!!!!
That will teach you for harassing me for the whole night!!! Muahahahahah!!!!!

Too many things have happened, events have come and gone.

Economic Recession, Iraq War II, Sars.....

I really have no idea where to begin writing. I can't help but realise, how fragile and vulnerable humans are. There has not been any news of joy for a very long time.

Ok ok, I admit that, this is a very poor attempt of writing constipation to make up for the lack of articles for the past 2 months. I will try again later, when inspiration strikes.

My New Week Resolution 1

To SLEEP at 11pm sharp every night.
To LEAVE the house at 8am on the dot.

This must be the curse of my life. With less than 8 hours of sleep, I am practically a walking zombie for the next day. Hopefully, this new resolution will be able to relieve the mental and physical stress of rolling out of bed and peeling my eyelids open.

As for the 2nd half, it is to prove to everyone (who has given me looks of disbelief, when I announced it) that I CAN DO IT! *fold arms, glint in the eye... !!zing!!**

Yet another *CNY

It is Chinese New Year again. Once upon a time, these words conjured up visions of new clothes, sweets, cookies and best of all, *ang paos! Even the tedious, respectful chants of "Great grandaunt" and "Cousin Ah Kow" (who is perhaps 10 times removed), the dangers of being suffocated by enthusiastic hugs, the drop dead boring waiting sessions (when old folks reminisce about their youthful exploits about 60 years ago) could not diminish the lure of the red packets. (See! We have been taught to be $$$minded at a tender young age!) Anyway, we didn¡¯t have much of a choice. What could little 8 year olds do in situations like that, except to put on a brave face and endure the ordeals?

20 years later, the thoughts of having to elbow my way through the mad crowds during sales (For some reasons, there are always sales at this period of time!) for new clothes, the high cholesterol and calorie levels of sweets and cookies and sitting through droning of 80 year old adventures (YES!! They never tire of repeating the same story every year!) seem drearier as CNY draws near. The pluses gained through the ang paos simply do not justify the agonies anymore.

Is it due to the fact that I am holding a job now and the ang paos aren¡¯t attractive anymore? Or is it due to the erosion of my grasp to my ethnic roots (as my father lectures us on the degeneration of traditional values of today¡¯s youths)? Or now that I am 28, I have the means to more choices and mobility?

Somehow I just do not see the point of sitting there, nodding my head eagerly to stories which I have heard for more than 20 times or making small talks to people whom I have either never met in my whole life or kept asking me if I have eaten already. To me, they are people whom I will not keep in contact with after my grandmother and my parents have passed on. Everything is mechanical and emotionless. Does this really endorse the true spirit of Chinese New Year? To me, it is a season to get together with close family members and friends. And the above certainly does not subscribe to this.

CNY gives a different meaning to my generation. There is no debating on if it is a merit or a minus because it is a change to our way of life. It is here to stay.

*CNY = Chinese New Year = Celebrated by the Chinese, in accordance to the Lunar Calendar
Ang Pao = Little red envelopes filled with money = Usually given by the older folks to the younger unmarried ones for good luck.

We Meet Again!

It has been more than a month since I have updated my blog. In fact, I did try updating it a while back, but apparently, the blogger server was going nuts that day and I couldn't get my posts up. After which, I confess that I have forgotten about it for a long while. Getting used to the whirlwind of acitivities, realigning my haphazard schedules and trying to beat the rule of "no using of internet for pleasure during office hours" (Yes! I am one of the parasites who (used to!) blog during office hours!!) took some time. However, after a full month of practice, I have finally mastered the art of gorging down my lunch within 30 minutes and thus relieving a teeny weeny bit of time for blogging.

Cutting the tedious matter short... I AM BACK!!!