ERP-Is it even vaguely helping??

It is yet another trying morning to get myself to the office, which fortunately (with the beautiful waterfront view) or unfortunately, sits smack in the middle of the CBD. With the new ERP schemes in place, traffic does not seem to have subsided under the pressure of the amount of dollars and cents ticking away from the cashcard.

In fact, I have already lost count of the timing and prices of the various gantries. When the ERP initially started, everyone was faithfully keeping track of it and we even had cars queueing on the shoulder of the road to save a few cents for the next cheaper time slot. But now, it was "Hey! When was this stupid gantry erected?! It wasn't here 3 months back! &#@%$#"

The gantries have been popping up like mushrooms in the most unlikely places! And now, if you try to get home between 6-8pm, you even have to pay! What is this about work-life balance? Are you going to stick around in the office until it is after 8pm? Or are you going to ignore it and join the crowd in paying for it and jamming up the roads? Seems like the plans of the Ministry of Transport and the Singapore Family Planning and Population Board are in conflict? How are we going to have more children and population growth if the parents are not going to be home because they need to avoid paying for the ERP? And the BIG question looms - WILL the SUCCESS of the ERP be at the COST of Singapore's future BABIES?!!!

Anyway, that is a sidetrack. As I was saying/writing, I have lost count of where/when/how much it cost to get through the gantries, so I simply gave up and stuck to my usual driving habits and just pay LOR.... According to my survey (more like being kapo(nosy) during tea-time), my survey subjects have also given up on remembering the details of the ERP gantries and have stuck to their normal driving times... So HAS THE ERP HELPED?! Right, it has definitely helped in increasing the amount that I need to top up the cashcard though. =p

Soon, you will see the article issued from the LTA on how "after the implementation of the this and this gantry on the this and this place, with the increase of this and this amount of dollars on this and this timing, the average speed on this and this stretch of road has crawled from 30km/h to 32km/h. Congratulations! The ERP has been a tremendous success! With this in view, we will continue to keep this in place until the average speed has finally increased miniscularly to 34km/h." I have always wondered how the average speeds were measured... definitely not through the speedometer of my car... Looking at it from their perspective, they simply cannot announce that "oh! We have built gantries all over Singapore and increased the toll prices but there is simply no change in the bottleneck situations. We have just as many cars on the road and just as much traffic jam around." When a problem crops up, they have to do something about it, whether or not it works, is a separate matter..

They call it the Electronic Road Pricing, I call it the Ever Redundant Plan.

The PHANTOM of the OPERA is HERE!

I thought I had outgrown Phantom and that I probably wouldn't enjoy it as much (considering that tonight's performance was my THIRD!). Phantom's splendid sets had never ceased to amaze me. The last time I watched it was in London. However, tonight's show was a strong reminder of its grandeur,the elaborate costumes and emotion evoking songs.

I had the greatest urge to insert my Phantom CD while I was in my car. But, as usual, my stuff was all over the place and it was definitely unreachable at that point of time. Well, the actor who played Phantom was fantastic, as usual. I don't remember having heard a lousy phantom before. Christine was good as well. However, 3 words appeared in my mind for Raoul - a weak voice. A very weak imitation of Michael Ball.

To me, I have always preferred Les Miserables to Phantom. I find Les Miserables more rousing and Phantom is, a love story. I have never been much of a romance junkie. I do read trashy romance novels now and then for stress relief and as an intermission for heavy duty reading. I even thought that the plot for Sleepless in Seattle was illogical (how could they possibly have recognised each other at the top of the empire state building?! DUH!), only to have my friend accuse me of being UN-romantic.

However, this time, at the final installment, where Phantom gave up Christine so that she could find her own happiness with Raoul, strangely, it felt like something was stuck in my throat. I am becoming a softie as i age. Sigh... Or it might very well, be that my seat was so good that I could see the anguished look on his face!

Phantom to me is more than a world-renowned musical. It brought back fond memories of the MAGXXM, scenes of us rolling around on Seow's bed, listening to musical CDs, her prancing around in her Phantom T-shirt and all the silly antics (which included making prank calls to the guys in our French class and making them say dumb-ass things). Life was so much simpler and idealistic then. I'm wondering if these are being remembered. I had the urge to call Seow and discuss about Phantom. But, now, everyone has her own life to lead, husband to pander to and children to fuss over. Nothing much, just a very strong sense of loss...

Anyway, it was great that I had been there, done that. It certainly beats not even having such memories at all.

So if you ask me, will I watch Phantom a 4th time? I'll tell you, "oh yes!" Not only that, I will prepare my Phantom cds on hand so that I will not be suffering from withdrawal after the musical ends.

Well, life goes on.... Back to reality now!

My Brother is Driving Me Nuts! Part 2.

Remember my "very clean" brother? Well, yesterday, he really outdid himself. I swore that for every cartridge, there was at least 1 bar of ink left. I checked. And, as usual, before every print job, my dear Brother went through his cleanliness routine. He cleaned himself so much that he used up all the available ink and left me stranded for my print job. ARGH! So now, I'm out of ink, and out of "print" job. This is just GREAT! Thanks to my dear Brother....

My Brother is a Cleanliness FREAK!

Here I am, dying to get my post printed out, in black and white, so that I can use it tomorrow, and then crawl into bed. BUT! My dear brother just has to clean himself! ARGH! Every time I ask him to perform a task, he will clean himself for at least 5-10 minutes before setting his mind to it! What's his problem! Is there a need to do that?! I can't stand his freakish habit!

Still, being such a cleanliness freak sure beats the Epson. My last Epson got so clogged up that the nozzles couldn't be used. That's how I ended up with Brother. But then again, nothing could beat my faithful HP. He slogged and slaved for me for a good 3 years before he decided that enough was enough. He hung up his inks and went into permanent hibernation. How I miss him!

After my clean little brother expires, I will go back to HP. Nothing beats good old HP....

The Lazy Person's Way to Tackle a Toastmaster's Project

Yes yes yes. I'm a dead duck. Tomorrow will be the long awaited day to articulate my Toastmaster's Project 2 speech. It's much anticipated, considering that I did my Project 1 speech, 1 year back. Procrastination kicks in ever so often.

Now, I can almost see the back of my head with my eyelids being strongly magnetised to the lower side of my eye sockets. My brain can hardly function with less than 8 hours of much needed Zzzzz...

I have, thus, decided to plagarise my own blog and rattle out the post on MRT habits tomorrow. Heck! I figure that since it's good enough to be read, it should be good enough to recite. But, I wonder if it's good enough to win the much coveted Speaker's award. It will be a miracle, since it's a such a 13th hour work. Oh well, just to get myself through the process. Project 2 here I come!

"Elevated" View

Feeling very satisfied after a full "Fei Siong" (Char Bee Hoon = Fried Noodles) meal, I joined a couple who were waiting for the elevator to arrive. As usual, when the elevator arrived, the LED lit up and the most logical thing to do, was to walk in. The guy (uncle) turned to the lady (auntie) and asked her,"Is this going up or down?" She turned to me (DUH!) and asked me "up or down?"

1. Shouldn't she be asking the people IN the lift?! (At that time, people were spilling out of the lift.)
2. We were at Plaza Singapura, Level B2! (If you are not familiar with Plaza Singapura, that is the lowest level.) YOU tell me whether it's going up or down! Going down the lift shaft at this point of time would be highly life threatening!!

Anyway, I forced my eyeballs from rolling and answered her with a straight face, "UP."

So, we all went in... happily... While in the elevator, SHE gave ME the incredulous look! As if I were the idiot! She probably peeked at the buttons on the panel.

Sheesh! I heard that suppressing one's natural reactions is unhealthy, it's probably as bad as stiffling your urge to go to the toilet. I should have told her,"Auntie, this is the lowest level. I hope the lift doesn't go down anymore." and give her the "you are siao" look.

Morning! You are Early!

"Morning! You are Early!"
Isn't there a strange morning greeting?! What's even stranger is, I am there, at the same time, at the same seat every single day. The strangest thing is, the people who usually say that, are never this early.

I find it as senseless as "Have you eaten today?" Of course, I have eaten today! If I don't eat every day, you won't have the chance to speak to me, right? I mean, if you have nothing better to say, then just smile (practise our Singapore's 4 million smiles campaign) and walk off, instead of saying something lame for the sake of saying something.

Some poor excuses of conversation fillers:
1. Have you eaten?
2. Have you eaten and are you full? (DUH! Most commonly used by people of the older generation)
3. Are you working today? (When you are in a suit and carrying a laptop. Gosh, no, I'm wearing the suit for fun and I'm actually carrying my laptop around to watch YouTube and to play Age of Empire!)
4. Is your work very tiring? (No, it's certainly a breeze.)
5. When are you getting a boyfriend? (The inevitable question, if you are still single.)
6. When are you getting married? (After you have satisfied Qn 5, they go on to the next one.)
7. When are you getting your first baby? (A followup question for qn 6)
8. When are you getting your next baby? (Yet, another followup questions to qn 7. I mean, is it part of their business if I'm getting a boyfriend, a husband, a baby or yet another baby or a divorce etc?! Sheesh! Why don't they ask me when's my birthday and give me a present for it?!)

These are the more commonly asked questions. Will add on to the list when I think of more.

Clip Clop Heels

Gone were the days when I possessed only 1 pair of brown heels and 1 pair of black heels (to match my meagre wardrobe which consisted of black/beige clothes), since Yinghui introduced me to strappy heels. Now, I have a few pairs in varying degrees of brown and black. Hah! (So if you happen to spy someone dressed in black or brown, that's moi!) Ok ok, go ahead and yawn at my boring wardrobe.

Anyway, to walk down a flight of stairs on a pair of strappy heels and to maintain the elegant posture, it takes a lot of patience and skill - 2 qualities absent from the very core of me. Therefore, imagine me, grimacing as I attempted my light-footed walk down the stairs, just to keep the decibels down. Picture the internal stress that it caused in me. I was almost experiencing a nervous breakdown, every time I come to a flight of stairs.

So, recently, I have given up all attempts to look ladylike and walking lightly down. What the heck! I simply bounced down the stairs in my normal manner and took pride in the deafening "clack clack" made by my heels. I received a few shocked looks from my fellow stair-walkers. Hey! It only gave me a chance to smile at them and make their day/night! Why not!

Therefore, I have resolved that I shall walk loudly and make the presence of my strappy heels known! If you want to walk down the stairs, why do it like a mouse?! Make it loud and clear and known!

I have just been stood up again... By my very own consultant. I'm going to box his ears when I see him on Monday. HMPF!

Another purpose for blogging is for cursing people! YOU ^%$%@#$#@ mangy dog! So there! I feel so much better... This is what happens when you get so bored, you start talking gibberish to yourself.

Youth or Middle-aged?

I have never pondered over this question before, until, one fine Sunday, when I went shopping at Plaza Singapura.

The hunt for a birthday gift brought me to an accessories shop at Plaza Sing. (What's new?! I'm here every Sunday! Haha! So now you know, all my gifts were bought from here.) There was an array of glass necklaces, earrings etc. A very friendly teenybopper salesgirl bounded up to me and cheerfully asked me if I needed her service. Why not??

Ahwei: I'm looking for a birthday present for my friend. Maybe a bracelet.
Salesgirl: Let me show you some nice ones. (She brought out a few.)
Ahwei: I'm thinking of getting her something which she can wear to work and all these look too casual.
Salesgirl: Maybe you could give me a description of what your friend looks like so that I can make some recommendations.
Ahwei: Well, she is description.
Salesgirl: How old is she?
Ahwei: Around 30.
Salesgirl: Oh, she's middle aged. I have some suirable ones for her. (She said it absolutely candidly and with conviction!!!)

Hmm..... Darn! Have I just left my youth behind and moved into middle age without knowing it?! *sob sob*

Sheesh.. I have always thought that middle age refered to at least age 40, since the expectancy of humans has stretched to age 80....

Feeling very perturbed over this, I checked an online dictionary (not only that, it's a MEDICAL dictionary!!). Here's what it said :

mid·dle age
n.

The time of human life between youth and old age, usually reckoned as the years between 40 and 60. Also called midlife.

Source: The American Heritage® Stedman's Medical Dictionary
Copyright © 2002, 2001, 1995 by Houghton Mifflin Company. Published by Houghton Mifflin Company.

So there! I'm right!! I'm still about 10 years (if you count the lower limit and another 30 years from the upper limit) away! So I'm still a youth!!

Tsk tsk! I should buy the salesgirl a dictionary... The English standard of the young youths in Singapore is deplorable....

Hair Problem Rectification Attempt!!

After suffering 4 days of criticisms, I felt that enough was enough. It's time to take some measures to right the fault.

Upon a recommendation, I hastened my way to Chinatown point (in dark shades and turban to lessen the possibility of being recognised) to get my fringe re-shaped.

While surveying the damage, the hairdresser asked, "Aiyo! Which hairdresser did you go to?! Why cut your fringe until sooo shoooort???!!!!"
Ahwei: Yalor Yalor! Lousy hor! Next time don't want to go there again!! (Who in the right mind would confess to this horrific crime?! So I decided to blame it on an imaginery person.)
Hairdresser: Please! Next time don't ask your hairdresser to cut until so short!! Not nice!! (Made some tsk tsk sounds) I will try to thin it. Next time when your fringe grows back longer, then I cut it nicely for you. Ok??

The fringe now looks a wee bit better than before. It will be another few months before I can get it styled again......

Hair Raising Experience?! The Very Opposite!!

I declare that this would be the very last time I would ever go to this hairdresser!! NEVER EVER EVER AGAIN!!

For weeks, I was looking at the world through the gaps in my fringe (sort of reminded me of those white and grey shaggy dogs) and as usual, I procrastinated getting it cut (what's new??). So one very day, I resolved to go to the nearest QB station to get my $10 haircut. They cut really decently for $10, serious!! However, I was soon talked out of it by Brenda and Julie, who declared that it's a total waste to spend 10 whole bucks, merely on trimming my fringe!!!! They convinced me on the merits of cutting my own hair, citing that it was not only simple (any idiot can do it) but it's also free....

I should have read Napolean Hill earlier. One of his chapters mentioned that Millionaires make their decisions quickly and chanage them slowly. Sigh....

So, I got ready the tool of the trade (bought a pair of scissors from Guardian because the scissors at home have developed teeth...) and prepared myself for life-changing event.

I carefully combed my fringe so that every strand of hair fell into place and delicately snipped it off, just below my eyebrows with 2 quick snips. That was easy and quick, ya??!! Feeling rather proud of myself, I took another view of it in the mirror and SHIIITTT!!! My fringe has shrunk above my eyebrows!!!!! I looked, and still does, absolutely TUT (slang for country bumpkin)!!

I realised that when I was cutting my hair, I was actually looking up, so, as a natural reflex, my eyebrows were raised. Therefore, I was actually measuring the length of my fringe against the raised eyebrows. Mystery solved.

All great people have to go through failures and jibes from the public. SO I braced myself and have since lived through 2 days of jibes and jeers. I have decidedly sacrificed myself for the good of the world, by providing them with good, clean entertainment for 2 whole days and a few more days to come. Meanwhile, I have just learnt that XO aids hair growth.....

P.S. Julie mentioned that I should have snipped my fringe in layers and not in 2 clean snips..... Just a word of advice for people who decide to take their hairs in their own hands.....

Oooi! Where's my drink? I can count up to 4!!


I know I know, it's sinful to eat KFC. Believe me, I have repented in the last few days and have been feeling very remorseful since.

But but, it was really tiring to go through one whole hour of saxophone class, so i decided to reward myself with a dose of KFC. I was patiently waiting for my order to be assembled when a voice boomed behind me,"Look here!" An uncle in T-shirt and berms was poking aggressively at his KFC discount coupons (almost making holes in them) and without a polite word of "excuse me", he started barking at the cashier.

"I ordered this, this and this so I should get 4 drinks, why did you only give me 3?! If I didn't count (as if it was so difficult to count from 3 to 4... duh.. wonder where he went to receive his primary school education), you would have CHEATED me of 1 drink!!"

I was just wondering, was his one miserable drink so expensive that KFC had to resort to cheating him out of it and he had to shout at someone about it. Sheesh...

The poor girl apologised fervently and gave him one drink. He threw her a malevolent look and stormed off. Gosh! What an attitude!! Who did he think he was?? It's just a drink, for goodness' sake...

Anyway, being nosier than usual, I took a seat near to his happy little family which consisted of him, his wife and 2 children. Throughout the whole meal, not many words were exchanged and he continued eating with a sour look on his face. At that point of time, I regretted (again..) that I didn't buy a camera phone, so that I could snap his face on the spot and post it here!!! Ack!

Didn't look like there was much communication going on there, and I wondered why... It would like quite strange if I were alone and was communicating with myself, but i can't imagine eating my lunch in silence if there were 3 other people I know around me.

So, there I was, feeling pity for the counter girl and "kapoing" at them from the corner of my eyes. He finished first and started digging at his teeth.. IN PUBLIC!! (regretted not buying a camera phone, again..) Feeling something beneath his slippers, he turned it up and... flicked a little bit of chicken stuck to the sole with his finger (YES! THE SAME ONE HE USED TO DIG AT HIS TEETH!) and then... he DUG AT HIS TEETH AGAIN! EEeewwww....!!!!

This was a typical someone who had no sense of hygiene and thought that he could scold others just because he could count more than 3 and had the money to buy KFC. Duh!! An interesting thought popped up,"Would his children grow up to be like him?" *Shiver* He just multiplied himself by 2x...(2 children mah! Can't you count??!!)

Where have you gone to?

It all happened on a Friday morning... KL was recounting to Kirk about my German hamster's (the nationality being its place of birth) escapades and the rest of my silly stories on my.. blog, before she exclaimed, "Hey! Is your blog still around!!??"

Oh yeah.. I do still have a blog. Although it's been at the back of my mind lately. Either I do not have any humourous stories to narrate or when one actually pops by, I have no time to pen it down and eventually, it deserts me.

As I went down memory lane just now, going through what I had written, I was really quite surprised with myself. Can I actually reproduce that now?

Oh my Humourous self, where have you gone?????

Icky Oatmeal Add-on

Pig's oatmeal was definitely the hot topic among the few of us last night. The conclusion was, that's how child prodigies are made, by devouring a lot of insects for protein. I will be collecting ants and roaches around my house for Pig's staple intake. See! So nice of me arh!

Icky Oatmeal

I have initially wanted to create a post on more MRT stuff, until I read Pig's most recent entry. Hey! What are friends for?! I should write something about a friend than a bunch of nameless strangers on the MRT, right??

Can you imagine eating something that you KNOW that you have kept it around for one whole year in the humid environment of this country? Awwww.... Yep! That was my first reaction!

I have seen his oatmeal concoction when I visited him once. "Beauty lies in the eye of the beholder" It stands true even for food. I thought it resembled something, which I had expelled from my stomach when I had food poisoning once, but then again, it looked like gourmet dinner to him. *Shrug* Oh well, to each his own. So you get the idea what it actually looks like. "The porridge-like texture and the taste is a combination die for -- what more can I ask for? - quotation from Pig I wonder if this sentence has a double meaning to it. *ponder* (It's a pity I didn't take the opportunity to capture it with a camera. Time to get a camera phone!)

On top of this, he gobbled it down even though he discovered some strange bits floating in it. *sigh*

Is it so difficult to prepare a healthy meal without eating vomit-like oatmeal with dead insects floating on it?

Pig, here's a simple recipe for you. If you are really going vegetarian, just cook a little rice/porridge. Get some nice leafy xiao bai cai, boil them for one minute and pour oyster sauce over them. I guarantee that they have a more pleasing aesthetic effect and more nutrients than your strange looking oatmeal. Simple enough for lazy you?

P.S Knowing him, he will probably pen a sarcastic comment later. However, in order to prove me wrong, he may forcefully restrain himself from writing the comment.

Excuse me, is this seat taken?




A survey on MRT riding habits.

1. At the entrance, do you
a. try to rub your big fat black bag over the ezlink sensor (a few times, that is, because the ezlink card in your bag has shifted from left to right)(especially if you are an auntie with a really big bag), valiantly enduring the scathing looks from the peak hour commuters behind you?
b. tap the sensor lightly with your ultra slim card holder?
c. pull your brakes just before the gantry, causing other commuters to collide headlong into you, before you dig into your bag to search for your ezlink card for a full 10 mins?

2. After you have painstakingly crossed the gantry, do you
a. run down the stairs to try to beat the rest of the commuters on the escalators, as it makes good sense to do a little exercise everyday?
b. stand beside someone on the right side of the escalator, being the only person standing in the right, enduring the daggered looks of the person behind you and hot breaths down your neck, while blissfully looking around, enjoying the scenary?
c. try to run down the right side of the escalator (to try to beat Mr. A), only to find Mr. B blissfully blocking your way?

3. After crossing rivers and mountains, when you have finally reached the platform, do you
a. lean against the glass panels like a spineless creature
b. ignore the yellow markings on the ground and stick your nose against the glass doors, because you are so shortsighted that you can't even see the doors (and the yellow markings) at all?
c. find a small seat between 2 people and squeeze yourself between them, causing one of them of fall off his/her end of the seat, just so that you can expand the size of your bum (my friend has this theory that women's bums grows due to prolonged sitting in the offices)? Now I'm Ms C here. Do you notice that, no matter how wide the space is, the 2 people will definitely shift themselves to give up miniscular amount of unneccessary space? Must be the human space I'm talking about. Hehe, I simple love to see people squim. Muahahaha.

4. When the MRT doors open with loads and loads of people in the 100m starting race position, do you
a. bash straight into them, rugby style, because you simply can't understand a very simple theory in physics that, in order for something to enter a full container, things must come out first?
b. stand at the side politely, while all the Mr. and Ms. As are bashing each other silly, to find that, when the mrt bells chime, there isn't any space for you, then resignedly wait for the next train?
c. turn ninja style and slowly edge from the side of the door and squirm yourself through the crowd?

Please write your answers in my comments (blabber) box. This post is in no way related to the SMRT and any similar reference is purely personal.

For All Sudoku Suckers (like me!) Out There!!

A thousand thanks to Kristin who has posted the link in my comments box. Check out this absolutely, mind boggling Fiendish Sudoku website! They provide 5 puzzles of different levels of difficulty each day. I can assure you that it will take up a fair bit of your time to solve all 5! I would say the puzzles from the previous link which I have given you probably fall under the catergory of easy. Hard takes slightly more time and Fiendish is, well, the name speaks for itself.

Sudoku

One more post, today, to make up for the lost months.

TS got me hooked onto this thingy. It's some number game with a unique solution. You will catch me huddled over my table, with a frown on my forehead, trying to figure out the solution. Just imagine the sense of satisfaction when I solve it! YES!

TS, the main supplier of the puzzles had to diligently download them from TODAY's website and photostat them for us. THANKS!!! But now, muahahhaha! I have discovered the ultimate source from YY's blog!

If you are a fan of Sudoku, wait no longer, just click on this link to satisfy your craving!

For the suakus (suaku = mountain turtle = ignoramus) who have never seen a sudoku puzzle before, here's one to increase your knowledge database.

2 Weeks of Nothing, but Sloth and Gluttony!

2 weeks of MC (Medical Leave), I'd better put it to good use. I'm supposed to be an invalid for this span of time, anyway. Invalid = I can eat, sleep, watch tv, surf net, but I'm not supposed to indulge in any form of housework or carry anything heavy. Sounds like heaven, eh? Hee hee.

Ok ok, I'm just abusing the MC to escape from work. Satisfied???? *fold arms* Well, I've never had a 2 weeks Mc before and yet, I can't wait to go back to work. I can be so masochistic, sometimes.

Well, Kok Wai told me to get my ass off (nag nag) and start writing something constructive in my blog (nag nag) and stop wasting cyberspace (nag nag). (Say! He's an awful nag for someone just one year older than I am. He's probably going to knock my head when he reads this, but then again, it may take him another 1 month or so to detour back here. So that's ONE MONTH REPRIEVE! Just can't stop myself from taking a dig at him.)

Therefore, here I am, trying to add some spice, vinegar, sugar, salt into everyone's (one who bothers to read this) life.

Stay tuned for more games and sarcasm!

*Akan Datang!

*I think it means To be continued...... in malay.

Waa! Incredible Surge in Comments!

See see! I actually have more than 20 comments for my last substandard, pathetic entry. Exhilarated, I thought, Hey! People are starting to take notice of my blog! Then, again, after browsing through the comments, they fall into 2 catergories:
1. Begging for $$
2. A standard "praise" for my blog before doing some free marketing for theirs.

If you don't have any constructive comments, then just don't write anything! BAH!

Ahwei's Dinner Law

There was Murphy, now there's Ah Wei....

When you want to go for dinner, no one is free.
When you don't want to go for dinner, everyone asks you to.

BAH!

I'm starving to death as I'm writing this....

Escape from the Crimson Room!

Received this link from Duma some time back. Solved it. Chucked it aside and forgot clean about it. Yesterday, I have received the link from Laval again. Took me some time to shovel through the thingy in my brain before I sieved out the location of the clues. Made a quick escape from the ROom! Ta Da!!!

Enter the Crimson Room... at your own risk... (Skull head symbol)

Well, if you are frustrated to the point of tearing out your hair, fear not, just drop me a blabber (or comment) and I will guide you through (if I'm in a good mood). It will be terrible if you become bald due to the game. Even Yunnam Centre will not be able to salvage the dire situation.

Colour Me Fancy!

Due to the elusiveness of Uncle Zhou (Zhou Gong = Father of Sleep) last night, insufficient oxygen is making its way to my brain matter. Rather than boring my readers with my whining, I chose to blog surf. Was just wondering if the pig has updated his blog, since the map thingy, therefore, popping in for a look. Had a rather pleasant surprise that, hey! He has indeed diligently added some articles (Pretty admirable, considering the amount of time he is spending on "mapling" his bowman.)

That took like a mere 5 mins…. (10 mins if you count the amount of time I took to add a miserable little comment.) Decided to check out his flogs.

Call it luck or what (since I haven’t been too lucky recently….), I came upon this "Shattered" Blog’s article on illustration of words. Cool yah?! Being vain little me, the first time I did… was… hehe… to type in my name.



I love it! It has all the elements of my favourite colours in them - Bright red, yellow and blue!!! I simply go gaa-gaa over primary colours. Check yours out and see if you can paste it in my comments page. Erm... what comments.. see the little tag on the left? It says Blabber, actually it's a comments tab. I was being heow that day when I named it and sigh, the comp idiot syndrome has kicked in and I have no clue how to amend it...

Maple - Part II

Blogger just lost part of this, which I have painstakingly toiled over for the last 30 mins... sheesh! This round will be factual, no more funnies.... I just lost my humour inspiration...

A little update on the progress on Lumino before the complaints pour in.

Lumino in a red moony hat, set off by her night black split top and white bottom.

(Chanting in a boring tone) Lumino in a brown Japo straw hat. She’ll be wearing this for a loooong loooong time to come…. Because the silly girl has spent all her money guzzling pots. (I don’t know which is worse… to spend money on clothes or on drugs.) Anyway, Axeo (He’s a cleric. Lucky pig! He doesn’t have to spend money on pots.) has kindly volunteered his healing aid so that Lumino can wean herself off drugs and buy herself more flashy clothes in order to live up to her fashion mage reputation.

Now, it’s time for complaints!!!!!!!!!!

Goodness Gracious! I thank God that the server which we are on, is a Southeast Asia Server and dominated by mostly Singaporeans. The kids are horrigibidific!!! See the extent of it! (Ok, I coined the word myself to show my exasperation!) The only good thing I can think of, is that, they are all contained in the SEA server. They must not be released to the world or else, there will be such a stink on Singapore’s name that 1 trillion bottles of top grade French perfume will not be able to cover it.

It is disheartening to realize that these are our future leaders. (Just to redeem some of them, I have met a few nice, decent kids). A bunch of cut-throats, extortionists, spoilt pesky brats and super whiners! That’s how realistic William Golding’s Lord of the Flies can be. (Hallo! It’s Lord of the FLIES not Rings! Yeah! I know I know, the ringy one is more famous… ) The super whiners go around, begging people for mesos, items etc…. And they practically whine til it gets on your nerves and you just have to throw them a bone.

Besides that, there were the unethical brats who go around stealing people’s kills! One moment, you were happily wacking this green monster, seeing gore and blood fly around, then in a flash of blue, it disappeared! Someone just stole the kill and all the experience and thus wasted the few happy minutes, which you have spent to decrease its resistance!

During one of my earlier days in Maple, when I was naïve and innocent, unlike the hard, realistic me now, I met this bloody kid.

Bloody kid : Can I have some money?
Me : (being a angel) Ok. (Gave him 1000 mesos)
Bloody kid : Not enough. I want 10,000 mesos.
Me : Sorry, no money.
Bloody kid : YOU LIAR!! (Bloody kid! That’s after I have given him 1k!!! Bloody ungrateful).
Me : ……
Bloody kid : If you don’t give me 10,000 mesos, I will ks (steal your kills) from now on!
Me : …… (Ignored the brat)

Guess what, the thug really stayed around and stole all my kills!

Sigh… Now you know where all the playground violence comes about. I have inferred that this must be the dumb kid who goes around the playgrounds and extorting his playmates. An alternative theory : He’s a victim himself and thus comes into maple to victimize others, because he is too cowardly to stand up for himself in the real world and he can terrorize people behind the safety of the computer screen. COWARD!!! Whatever the case is, the parents ought to be whipped for producing such a kid. If they have no time to impart good values to them, then don’t give birth to them lar!!!!

Ok… I have let out my frustration. Beware the next brat who crosses me!!!!

Maple Story - My Latest Craze!

Being too destitute to play World of Warcraft (It costs US$40 for a 3 month subscription, on top of the 100 over bucks for the software itself. It's definitely a rich man's game!!!), I can only play this super *kawaiii online game - Maple Story.

I informed Duma about it and he promptly told me, "Nah! I'm busy every night. I have to hold midnight conversations with my darling cupcake. No time to play games!!!" DUH! I told Yy about it the next day and the efficient gal downloaded it immediately and started playing it. That very very night, Duma was logged in and happily playing. DUMA! EAT YOUR WORDS!!!! Guess he didn't have much of a choice, the person whom he's holding twilight talks with is playing the game, so, in order for him to continue his chat... he simply has to play the game. Muahahahhaah!

Enough about Duma! As I was saying, I have this absolutely adorable character there. Lumino's the name, of course, she aspires to be a fire mage in future. You can certainly tell that from her name. The older generation of people who have been playing RPG, certainly has a more vibrant imagination, when picking names for their characters, unlike the fresh, new generation. I have come across names like NinNaoHeah, LeLaoPeh, Loverboy, Inuyasha1234 (sheesh this looks like someone who can't think of a better original name). DUH DUH! That's Singaporean for you.

Oh yeah! I have to flash this absolutely endearing picture of Lumino.

Lumino in 2nd stage. I didn't know how to use the snapshot function when she was in her 1st stage. Therefore, I missed her baby photo! Sob!

Lumino in 3rd stage.

Notice that the clothes get prettier as my level gets higher? Yes! You are right! I'm levelling Lumino so that she can get prettier clothes and make a fashion statement! Observe the well-coordinated colours. Arrrhhh....! If you want to play, play it with style!

*kawaii = cute (in japanese). Not so sure about the spelling though, but, you got the idea right?

Shrink... Shrink... GONE!

Have you been to seminars/workshops/lectures? I would assume so. I have been to tonnes of them.

Another observation : Have you ever noticed that people walk in and out of the room during the session?

Observation #3 : The strange thing is, they simply refuse to use the backdoor, but would prefer to do that right before a hundred pairs of eyes.

Observation #4 : Not only that, they always perform this weird movement of lowering their heads or hunching their backs as they stride across the room.

Observation #5 : Gosh! Some genie must have taught them that! That is, by hunching your back or lowering your heads, you would either become invisible or shrink to a miniscular size and nobody will notice you sauntering across the room.

The Bad News : Well, it certainly doesn't work. Despite all the hunching, lowering, attempts to run across with lightning speed, we still see them...... BIG as life. Would someone please tell them so that they will stop embarrassing themselves in front of a huge audience and in public??

You Have, I Have!


The lunchtime (or dinnertime) topics revolve around babies, babies and more babies! Argh!!! I think I will go mad if I were to hear more about what to eat, what not to eat during pregnancy down to which milk pump to use. Can you beat that?! Anyway, right after a girl gets married, the next most exciting thing would be to have a baby after the whirlwind of marriage.

One of my friends, who's currently pregnant, commented,"There are a lot of pregnant ladies around. I was waiting for my friend for lunch at the junction and boy, do I see MANY pregnant women waddling around!!" I told her that it's because she's in a similar condition, therefore she noticed this.

It's just like.... before you buy a car, yeah, you vaguely know that Singapore roads are congested, especially when you are in a rush (Notice how all traffic lights are red and lifts are always at the top floor when you are in a hurry. sheesh...). But after you have bought a car, you notice that, "Hey! Toyota is such a popular brand (you pat yourself on your back, good buy!!) that everyone on the road is driving one! (Down with Honda! Down with erm.. Mitsubishi etc) And a Silver one at that!!!!"

Strange! Suddenly the whole world is filled with pregnant women and silver Toyotas!!!!!

Hey! Everyone's using an IBM laptop after I bought one! That's a brilliant buy there, Ah Wei!

An All New Sax Experience! Ahhh...!!

Just a quick scribble before my meeting at 4pm.

Yes, yes, be patient, I'm going to describe the experience right now.

It all took place on a hot, humid Saturday afternoon (last Saturday, to be precise). We gathered in a small air-conditioned room, fine-tuning our instruments (getting ready for the MASS ORGY! According to pig, mass orgy simply means some group activity, pig, right???).

I finally had my turn on stage (yeah, a stage too, kinky eh?) for the rehearsal.

Anyway, all in all, everything went well. I was one of the last few participants, so I had to wait for 1 whole hour before I got my turn. A few of them were pretty good. One of them, the youngest partipant, I believe, did a Kenny G item on his soprano saxophone. It's supposed to be a students' concert, hmm... I believe he must be a teacher or something, he's too good to be a student!!!!! *Spoil market!! The other one was a flutist who's actually on a music scholarship. The rest were almost like me... half bucket water. hee hee.

Some comments from my ardent fans who attended the concert - the music was great, everything's in tune (I lived in fear that I would create some unearthly squeaky sound.), except, I looked like a big piece of wooden block. Hey! Considering that this was my first time on stage with an alto saxophone, I was worried that if I were to take my eyes off my book, I would play the wrong tune and of course I was too nervous to do anything else except... blow?!

Right, I have taken down the comments and shall practise way way way way in advance for my next performance. I will :
1. stop looking like a wood.
2. stop glaring at my music book.
3. move my head up and down and sideways to create more entertainment value.
4. hop around and do a breakdance number, ending on my knees and the last note.
5. perm my hair like Kenny G.

That should be enough for now.

Still, my neighbours must be very glad that they do not have to put up with my "Moonriver" renditions every night at 11pm. No choice mah! I leave the house at 9am every morning and does not get home til 1030pm at night!! My peaceful playing should lull them to sleep (hopefully).

I shall do a jazz number the next time.

*Spoil market = set too high a standard for the rest of the people to live up to.

To Market, To Market

The biggest news in the Straits Times in the last few days was, and still is, the arrest of CAO CEO Chen Jiulin for fraud and insider trading. Everyone I know, knows someone who has lost money from the CAO stock crash just a few months back. It was pretty easy to tell... the people who were going around, muttering to themselves, with knitted eyebrows, on the very day, when news of suspension of CAO stock trading was announced.

However, they soon pushed it to the very back (this little dark closet, into which they stuff unpleasant experiences and conveniently forget about them) of their minds and happily continued with their stock market trading. Sigh.

One of the stock trading books says, "if you find the aunties and uncles at the fish market passing each other tips on stock trading, it's time to get out of the market...."


Doesn't this look familiar to you? Yep yep! It's a typical stock chart! What do you mean, it looks ugly! I drew that myself!! Can you imagine the pain I had to go through to draw this chart, using the Paint software and a touchpad?? The cramp my poor fingers had to go through!!


Anyway, as I was saying.... Do you see the tiny red arrow squiggle? Right, that's the point where instituitional investors inject their huge amount of funds. As a result, it drives the price up sharply.


At this point, dealers, research analysts saw this and quickly put in their own trades. Sorry, minus the research analysts, that would constitute insider trading... So, the dealers put their $$ in.


In the middle of the night, Ah Wei is awakened by the incessant ringing of the phone. It's Ah Wei's stock dealer on the phone,"Hey! Hot tip hot tip! Stock ABC is shooting up. Put your money in!!!" Overwhelmed by gratitude and appreciation (Dale Carnegie, my idol, says that you have to show gratitude and appreciation so that people will work harder for you...), Ah Wei puts a hell lot of $$ into ABC and falls back to sleep. Therefore, the price goes up even higher, as all the sleepy Ah Weis throw their money in.


The news spread like wildfire.... The next day, Ah Wei goes marketing and overhears the auntie at the fish stall tell the ah ma at the pork stall,"Waa! Hot Tip! My son's dealer called him in the middle of the night to put in $$ for ABC! Waaa!! Guess what! This morning, the ABC REALLY go up by 100 points!!!! Eh! You want to put $$ in? I'm going to look at the tv screen (she's referring to the updating of the stock prices at the dealing companies), then I'm going to put in all my savings! Won't go wrong wan!!!!" So Auntie and Ah Ma go hand-in-hand to watch "tv" and put even more money in!!!

Satisfied with the earnings, now that price of ABC has shot up all the way to the sky, the big instituitional investors decide to perform a massive sell action. With the exit of such a huge amount of fund, the price plunges......... while the aunties and uncles are rejoicing in their sleep over their good buy.

The dealers are alerted to the sudden plunge, so they save their own skins first by quickly selling their shares. "Heng! At least i have made a bit of profit! Oh yeah! Have to call up Ah Wei to tell her about this!!"


Awakened in the middle of the night by the irritating telephone ringing again. Damn! I should have unplugged the phone before I sleep. "What.. what?! Sell!? Stock is plunging?! ok ok! Sell everything for me!!!" Ahhh!! There goes my investment! Have to start saving up again!

Some days later, when Ah Wei goes marketing, the fish stall is closed and another ah ma is selling pork at the stall.... The newspapers are splashed with stories of people turning into paupers overnight... people jumping off high rise buildings.... The red skull (Is my drawing so bad that you can't tell that it's a skull!!!! ok ok, you have to remember that I draw it with a touchpad....)signifies an end...

Therefore, when everyone is buying a certain stock, it's time to move out....

He he... It's easier to preach and practise.... Take the advice at your own risk.